Many people across the world will be sitting on this, another New Year’s Eve, the metaphorical and literal brink of a new dawn, reflecting on what was and contemplating what may be.
Making promises to themselves that this is their year. New Year, New Me!

Not me… I’m calling Bull Shit on “New Year, New Me”!

Almost everyday for the past 15 months I’ve looked back. I’ve analysed every detail of my past life with fresh eyes, with the benefit of hindsight and with the new knowledge I’ve gained along the way.

And you know what…Nothing’s changed!

The past is still the past. Nothing, not one thing has changed, not one iota. (Not that I would actually want it to change! But there we are)!

Conversely, I look ahead. I plan for the future, I set goals and targets, everyday. Milestones no matter how small or insignificant they may seem, they help me feel like I’m moving forward in some guise or another. One vitally important thing has, through this exercise, engrained itself in my mind; No amount of planning, wishing, hoping or believing will change the course of destiny. What will be will be. It’s that simple!!

I’m not saying don’t have dreams, and I’m not encouraging that you lose faith, far from it in fact. I’m not even saying don’t change or make plans to change. But do it despite “New Year”. Do it today, NOW. Tomorrow. Next week. Whenever you feel the need to change something in your life just get on with it. Don’t wait for the next birthday or the next New Year. Just do it now!

As a society we punish ourselves so much, always feeling less than. Always wishing we were more, could do more, earn more, love more. And with that and the dawn of a New Year comes massive expectation to full fill those wishes.

For what?

To punish ourselves that our resolutions failed before work starts again on the 4th. To look back and agonise, full of regrets of opportunities missed in the year gone by.

So why bother?

Why do we Insist on jumping on this band wagon year after year?

We just never learn!

So I sit here choosing to ignore the hype and instead select to bring in the new year with my boys. The only people in this world who know what my heart sounds like from the inside. And that makes me happy. We let off a Chinese lantern to mark the occasion, a symbol of letting the past go and bringing in the new with love and light. But that’s it – it’s just a symbol. I’m not going to dwell, but just live in the moment.

I won’t spout any clichés about my blessing and losses, I’ve done that enough over the course of this divorce journey. Nor will I make promises or resolutions only to be disappointed if the universe has other plans for me. I’m just going to wake tomorrow and see what this crazy life has in store for me. Come what may, whatever is waiting to greet me I’ll deal with it!

I’ll learn my lessons, in the moment and I’ll course correct accordingly. Right there and then!

So I say Bull Shit to New Year, New You”! And instead I say “Happy New Year to the best you you can be today tomorrow and everyday!”

To constant evolution.

To being kind to ourselves.

…Because we all deserve it!